Let’s be honest- cats are indeed internet influencers, and honestly, they also rule our lives sometimes. Whether they’re knocking off our coffee from the table at 3 a.m. or scratching lovely on your hands, I hope this collection of 50 funny cat quotes is purr-fectly hilarious and will have something for you.
Let’s dive in!
Classic Cat-itude Quotes
“In ancient times cats were worshipped as gods; they have not forgotten this.” – Terry Pratchett
“Cats are connoisseurs of comfort.” – James Herriot
“Cats rule the world. Dogs drool. Literally.” – Unknown
“Dogs have owners, cats have staff.” – Unknown
“My cat is not spoiled. I’m just well-trained.” – Unknown
“When all else fails, take a nap. Preferably in the sun. Or in the laundry.” – Unknown
“I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.” – Hippolyte Taine
“The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an axe murderer.” – Paula Poundstone
“My cat’s favorite hobby? Knocking things off tables while making eye contact.” – Unknown
“I used to have a shred of dignity. Then I got a cat.” – Unknown
Savage Like a Cat
“If cats could talk, they wouldn’t.” – Nan Porter
“Cats are smarter than dogs. You can’t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.” – Jeff Valdez
“A cat will do what it wants when it wants, and there’s not a thing you can do about it.” – Frank Perkins
“My cat doesn’t care if I’m crying. She just wants her treat.” – Unknown
“Cats: because someone has to knock your ego down a peg.” – Unknown
“My cat walked across my keyboard and somehow opened 12 tabs, emailed my boss, and ordered sushi.” – Unknown
“Cats are like potato chips. You can’t have just one. And they leave crumbs everywhere.” – Unknown
“Never try to outstare a cat. You’ll lose and feel judged forever.” – Unknown
“I clean my house for guests. My cat trashes it in under five minutes. Balance.” – Unknown
“Cats: Proof that the universe has a sense of humor.” – Unknown
Lazy Royalty
“Sleeping is like meditation… with purring.” – Unknown
“Cats sleep 70% of their life. That’s the dream.” – Unknown
“Nap hard. Knock things over harder.” – Unknown
“My cat’s daily routine: eat, sleep, ignore, repeat.” – Unknown
“If I fits, I sits. Even if it’s your cereal bowl.” – Unknown
“Cats: the only creatures who can make laziness look graceful.” – Unknown
“The floor is lava. Unless there’s sun on it. Then it’s a nap zone.” – Unknown
“My cat’s to-do list: 1. Sleep. 2. Attack foot. 3. Meow at ghosts.” – Unknown
“Being a cat means never having to say you’re sorry for knocking things off the counter.” – Unknown
“Cats invented the art of doing nothing with elegance.” – Unknown
Overly Dramatic Furballs
“I opened the wrong can of food. The betrayal in her eyes…” – Unknown
“My cat looks at me like I’m an inconvenience to her kingdom.” – Unknown
“The look of horror when I shut the bathroom door without her.” – Unknown
“If I die, please feed my cat first. She’ll be mad.” – Unknown
“My cat acts like every meal is her last. Even though she just ate 5 minutes ago.” – Unknown
“You haven’t known guilt until your cat stares at you for going on vacation.” – Unknown
“Cats don’t meow. They emotionally manipulate with sound.” – Unknown
“One sneeze and my cat acts like I’ve committed treason.” – Unknown
“My cat just knocked over a plant and looked at me like I messed up.” – Unknown
“Drama queen? More like Drama Meow-narch.” – Unknown
Relatable Cat Owner Struggles
“My cat doesn’t come when called. She arrives when it’s convenient—for her.” – Unknown
“I think my cat owns the house. I just pay the bills.” – Unknown
“Tried to sleep in. Cat sat on my face. Guess that’s over.” – Unknown
“Ever feel like your cat is judging your life choices? Same.” – Unknown
“I bought a fancy cat bed. She sleeps in a cardboard box.” – Unknown
“My black clothes are now gray. Thanks, cat hair.” – Unknown
“I have 900 photos on my phone. 860 of them are my cat doing absolutely nothing.” – Unknown
“I opened tuna and became the most interesting person in the world—for 3 minutes.” – Unknown
“Cat logic: ignore me all day. Want cuddles at 3 a.m.” – Unknown
“I think my cat runs a secret mafia in the neighborhood. The squirrels seem terrified.” – Unknown
Final Meow: Cats, Comedy & Chaos
That’s the end of our collection of 50 funny cat quotes that are purr-fectly hilarious. Hope you found something funny and perfect for your cat-loving friends.
Don’t forget to save this for yourself whenever you need it.
So go ahead, share these quotes with your fellow feline enthusiasts. Or print one out and tape it to your cat’s litter box—just for fun.
