Let’s be honest- Christmas is all about those moments that make you remember for the next whole year, trying not to lose your mind while deciding what to buy as a gift. If you’re one of the people who want to just hibernate till January during the holidays, welcome. You’re in the right place. In this post, we’ve gathered 40 lol Christmas quotes for the holiday.
Let’s unwrap the laughter!
LOL Christmas Quotes to Kickstart the Holiday Cheer
Christmas Quotes Everyone Finds Relatable
“Santa Claus has the right idea—visit people only once a year.” — Victor Borge
“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” — Gary Allan
“I stopped believing in Santa when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph.” — Shirley Temple
“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” — Andy Borowitz
“Nothing says holidays like a cheese log.” — Ellen DeGeneres
“My husband’s idea of getting the Christmas spirit is to become Scrooge.” — Melanie White
“I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.” — Henny Youngman
“The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven’t seen for 20 minutes.” — Julius Sharpe
“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know… the birth of Santa.” — Bart Simpson (The Simpsons)
“What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.” — Phyllis Diller
Hilarious Christmas Quotes About Family & Festive Chaos
“Once again, we come to the holiday season—a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.” — Dave Barry
“Family Christmas: the time of year when your whole family gathers together in one place… to remind you why you moved out.” — Unknown
“Christmas is a magical time of year… I just wish someone would tell my family that.” — Unknown
“The best Christmas gift I got was the chance to be around my family. The worst gift was actually being around them.” — Unknown
“Christmas: the only time of year you can sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of socks.” — Unknown
“My family told me to stop telling Christmas jokes… but I didn’t sleigh.” — Unknown
“Christmas is all about finding the perfect tree… and pretending your family won’t notice the giant bald patch in the back.” — Unknown
“Christmas with family: loads of fun… if by fun you mean chaos sprinkled with arguments.” — Unknown
“I love my family, but if we play one more round of charades, someone’s going to end up in the tree.” — Unknown
“Christmas calories don’t count. Family drama does.” — Unknown
Funny Christmas Quotes About Gifts & Shopping
“One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas Day. Don’t clean it up too quickly.” — Andy Rooney
“The Christmas spirit is… losing your wallet in a mall and finding it in the food court.” — Unknown
“I’m dreaming of a white Christmas… but if the white runs out, I’ll drink red.” — Unknown
“Dear Santa, I was good this year… okay, maybe not all year… fine, I’ll buy my own gifts.” — Unknown
“I love Christmas shopping. It’s so fun to spend money I don’t have on gifts people don’t need.” — Unknown
“For Christmas, I want Santa to bring me a fat bank account and a skinny body. Let’s hope he doesn’t mix them up like last year.” — Unknown
“My credit card gets such a workout at Christmas it should count as cardio.” — Unknown
“The only Christmas gift I really want is eight hours of sleep… wrapped up with a bow.” — Unknown
“Wrapping gifts is my cardio. Actually opening them is my therapy.” — Unknown
“Christmas shopping tip: avoid the crowds. Shop online… and pray the delivery gods are kind.” — Unknown
Short & Sassy LOL Christmas Quotes
“Sleigh my name, sleigh my name.” — Unknown
“Resting Grinch face.” — Unknown
“Too lit to quit.” — Unknown
“Dear Santa, define ‘nice’.” — Unknown
“Feast mode: ON.” — Unknown
“Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal.” — Home Alone 2
“Jingle all the way… and then nap.” — Unknown
“Jolly vibes only.” — Unknown
“Ho-ho-hold on, December is expensive!” — Unknown
“Current mood: Powered by hot cocoa.” — Unknown
Final Thoughts — Laugh Your Way Through Christmas
Christmas doesn’t always have to be perfect – it just has to be full of memories, messy, chaotic, loud, and hilariously imperfect, and that’s what it beautiful. I hope you enjoyed reading this 40 lol Christmas quotes for the holiday, and save some to use when Christmas comes.
Merry Christmas—and may your holiday season be full of laughter, love, and zero burnt cookies.
